That Boy needs Therapy

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Steven Mullaney Some shoddy piece of card means nothing! If you love me, bake me a cake!
14 Feb 2010

Steven Mullaney hates Christmas parties, I feel sick; all that ‘being nice’ stuff - I really shouldn’t drink the free red wine.
30 Dec 2009

Steven Mullaney Feels this pending hangover is going to be as welcome as a Jehovah Witness with Syphilis knocking on the door at six in the morning.
27 Dec 2009

Steven Mullaney Oh, how I hate you. I hate you so much it gives me energy. I have to get up early in the morning just to hate you because there's not enough time in the day!
25 Dec 2009

Steven Mullaney I can put up with a lot of things; hip hop music about lip gloss, people that wear Mickey Mouse hands on hats whilst dancing to the alphabet song, people that think Cliff Richard actually exists. But Jesus Christ! How does one justify selling a Christmas dinner with only ‘ONE’ pig in blanket?
21 Dec 2009

Steven Mullaney Not a problem that can't be cured with a little red wine, except leprosy perhaps.
13 Dec 2009

Steven Mullaney Is feeling as random as a pink elephant eating a banana peel in a pool of spatulas baby! x
21 Oct 2009

Steven Mullaney Help, NO WINE LEFT, head sobering, reminiscences forming, what is happening to me! Help me!!
19 Oct 2009

Steven Mullaney Is a bad person, has always been, and yet you people are always surprised!
21 Sep 2009

Steven Mullaney Hasn’t been this puzzled since Mr Bailey showed him a kiwifruit in 1998
20 Sep 2009

Steven Mullaney thinks there’s too many people in this world, only really need about six.
29 Aug 2009

Steven Mullaney is never going outside again... unless I need someplace to throw up, which may be very soon thanks to this perpetual hang-over
22 Aug 2009

Steven Mullaney is not amused, Facebook is broken, wonder if MySpace will take me back? I’ll buy some flowers.
16 Aug 2009

Steven Mullaney It’s all your fault I’m drunk, look at you all, all over the place like a nest of pigs! If I wasn’t trapped here I wouldn’t have so much to blot out.
31 July 2009

Steven Mullaney This little piggy stayed home
14 July 2009

Steven Mullaney Run, run, as fast as you can! You can't catch me I'm the Gingerbread Man!
27 June 2009

If man was a train, society would be the track; a predetermined result of compliance for the leader of the pack. Unfortunately, it’s as encouragingly meaningful as the religious tale of the crippled sheep. “But why?” she said, “why not?” he responded, “if, as I stand here, in line, waiting to be served at the ASDA checkout, I decide to rub my fingers in circular motion around my nipples, then I will” well what could she say; he had a point. You can’t derail yourself from the tunnel, but when you see the light, you can make sure you’re brighter. A ghost has no concept of time, correction; a ghost has no concept of our time, but then time is relative to everyone anyway. The corpse is nothing more than a husk with the spirit elsewhere, the ghost is the spirit, the ghost is living, or an echo, but we’ll conveniently avoid that bit. Death is nothing more than a transition, and thus you live forever, that is, if ghosts are real. Unless your husk once housed a nut, then you believe in religion (same thing), and therefore believe in heaven, even though it clashes with the ideal of every other living organism on this hanging sphere; I bloody hate harps, and discussions on the calories in Philadelphia light. I don’t want to be rewarded for my inhumane ignorance and arrogance by a creative version of Mussolini. “Is this banana flat?” pondered the monkey on drugs “let’s publish a seven hundred thousand word essay about it” said the other monkey, which had an empty wallet to fill.
Now do that tie up, otherwise you’ll trigger the disapproval of our leader *points at sky whilst doing a woo noise* No; you refuse too? Then I’m afraid expulsion is the only answer, it’s the opinion of the entire staff that Dexter is criminally insane!

That Boy Needs Therapy

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